Unfortunate Sex Life of the Banana

The humble banana almost seems like a miracle of nature. Colourful, nutritious, and much cherished by children, monkeys and clowns, it has a favoured position in the planet’s fruitbowls. The banana is vitally important in many regions of the tropics, where different parts of the plant are used for clothing, paper and tableware, and where the fruit itself is an essential dietary staple. People across the globe appreciate the soft, nourishing flesh, the snack-sized portions, and the easy-peel covering that conveniently changes colour to indicate ripeness. Individual fruit—or fingers—sit comfortably in the human hand, readily detached from their close-packed companions. Indeed, the banana appears almost purpose-designed for efficient human consumption and distribution. It is difficult to conceive of a more fortuitous fruit.

The banana, however, is a freakish and fragile genetic mutant; one that has survived through the centuries due to the sustained application of selective breeding by diligent humans. Indeed, the “miraculous” banana is far from being a no-strings-attached gift from nature. Its cheerful appearance hides a fatal flaw— one that threatens its proud place in the grocery basket. The banana’s problem can be summed up in a single word: sex

Awesome Quotes...

Awesome Quotes…

(No offence meant to anyone.. J)

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UNIX is simple. But It just needs a genius to understand its simplicity.

-Dennis Ritchie

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Before software can be reusable, it first has to be usable.

—Ralph Johnson

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Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.

-Fred Brooks

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It's hard enough to find an error in your code when you're looking for it;

It's even harder when you've assumed your code is error-free.

-Steve McConnell

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The trouble with the world is that the stupid are sure,

and the intelligent are full of doubt.

-Bertrand Russell

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(This is the best 1.....)

If debugging is the process of removing bugs,

Then programming must be the process of putting them in..

-Edsger Dijkstra

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You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic;

You cannot have both at the same time.

–Bertrand Meyer

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There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third works.

-Alan J. Perlis

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Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.

-Bill Gates

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The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time.

The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time.

-Tom Cargill

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Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs.

The Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots.

So far the Universe is winning.

-Anon

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Theory is when you know something, but it doesn't work.

Practice is when something works, but you don't know why it works.

Programmers combine Theory and Practice:

Nothing works and they don't know why.

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The Six Phases of a Project:

· Enthusiasm

· Disillusionment

· Panic

· Search for the Guilty

· Punishment of the Innocent

· Praise for non-participants

10 Easy Ways To Organize Your Business Finances

Whether you are a new entrepreneur or a more experienced business owner, taking control of your finances can feel like a part-time job. Some simple tips can help you streamline your time, organize your finances and reduce the stress of business money matters. Check out details on finance at Money Tips / http://moneytips.buyme.co.in/finance/

1. Keep Your Bills in One Place

When the mail comes, make sure it goes in one place. Misplaced bills can be the cause of unwanted late fees and can damage your credit rating. Whether it's a drawer, a box, or a file, be consistent. Size is also important. If you get a lot of mail, use an area that won't get filled up too quickly.

2. Pay Your Bills on Schedule

Bill paying can be simplified if it's done at scheduled times during the month. Depending on how many bills you receive, you can establish set times each month when none of your bills will be late. If you're paying bills as you receive them, chances are you're spending too much time in front of the checkbook. Although bills may state "Payable Upon Receipt", there's always a grace period. Call the creditor to find out when they need to receive payment before the bill is considered late.

3. Read Your Credit Card Statements

Most people take advantage of low interest credit card offers but never read their statements when paying the bill. Credit cards are notorious for using low interest as bait for new customers then switching to higher rates after a few months. Make a habit of looking at your statement carefully to see what interest rate you are paying each month and if any transaction fees have been applied. If the rate increases or a transaction fee appears on your statement, a simple call to the credit card company can oftentimes be beneficial in resolving the matter. If not, try to switch your money to a more favorable rate.

4. Take Advantage of Automatic Payments

Most banks offer a way to automatically deduct money from your account to pay creditors. In addition, the creditors usually offer a lower interest rate when you sign up for this payment option because they get their money faster and on-time. Consider it as one fewer check to write, envelope to lick and stamp to buy. Just make sure you record the deduction when the automatic payment is scheduled or you run the risk of bouncing other checks.

5. Computerize Your Checkbook

Using a software program is a handy way to organize your finances. Whether it's Quicken(r), Microsoft Money(r) or another package, these easy-to-use programs make bill paying and bank reconciliation a cinch. Computer checks can be ordered almost anywhere and fit right into most printers. Once the checks are printed, all of the information is automatically recorded in your electronic checkbook. Furthermore, many banks have direct downloads into these software packages so when money is deposited or withdrawn, the transaction is entered immediately onto your computer. And, when it comes time to do taxes, it couldn't be easier.

6. Get Overdraft Protection

Most banks have a service where, if you run the risk of bouncing a check, the money will come from another source. For a nominal fee, the bank will link your checking account to either a savings, money market, or credit card so the embarrassment of bouncing a check will be avoided. Call or visit your bank to learn about this convenient feature.

7. Cancel Unused Accounts

Whether it's a credit card or bank account, write a letter requesting that the account is formally closed. Not only will this improve your credit score, it is a useful way to avoid money from being scattered all over the place. Don't let department stores and credit card companies lure you into opening new accounts by offering favorable interest rates and purchase discounts. It's easy for credit to get out of hand by taking advantage of every credit offer that comes your way.

8. Consolidate Your Accounts

If you have several credit card accounts with outstanding balances, try to consolidate them into one. Be careful and check the balance transfer interest rates and one-time fees. Also, make a list of all your open Money Markets, Savings, CDs, IRAs, Mutual Funds, and other accounts to see if any consolidation can be done. Keeping your money in fewer places eliminates all of the guesswork involved and reduces errors.

9. Establish Automatic Savings

Create a link from your checking account into a savings account that will not be touched. This can usually be done through the banks and automatic amounts will be transferred over each month. Most people will not put money into a savings account on a regular basis. They may wait until a large tax refund check arrives or some other event to actually deposit money into savings, retirement or other accounts. If you establish an automatic savings deposit every month, your accounts will begin accumulating money faster than you think.

10. Clean up Your Files

Make sure your paid bills are organized in a filing cabinet. Keep individual files for paid bills. Go through your files at the end of each year and throw out bills and receipts no longer needed for auditing purposes. Contact your local IRS office to see how long records need to be kept for audits. Usually federal tax return audits can be done three years back but cancelled checks may need to be kept for seven. Consult the Internet for auditing and records-keeping procedures for your state or region.

Visit: MoneyTips